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Advice From The Pros: Telling It Like It Is

by Katie Dohman on July 1st, 2009

The simplest sentences and websites take the most thought. Ruthlessly revising and deleting is the hallmark of great writing — and how you keep readers on your site. Jakob Nielsen reports that readers read at most only 20 to 28 percent of the contents on a web page. Many stay for less than FOUR SECONDS.

To reiterate: You have FOUR SECONDS OR LESS to show a user that you have the information that he or she is looking for. Anything that’s not entirely relevant or usable has got to go. Or your user’s gonna leave your site.

Knowing that, here’s some advice from the pros that I rely upon when I’m getting too wordy:

“Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words? He thinks I don’t know the ten-dollar words. I know them all right. But there are older and simpler and better words, and those are the ones I use.”
Ernest Hemingway

“Words, like glass, obscure when they do not aid vision.”
Joseph Joubert

My favorite book on writing is On Writing Well, by William Zinsser. The lessons are incredibly relevant, even if the bulk of the book was written before the dawn of the internet. There are a million golden rules on every page, but it’s not overwhelming. I’ve highlighted nearly everything in the book.

Here’s what’s most relevant in terms of the work we do every day:

“Clutter is the official language used by corporations . . .

Beware, then, of the long word that’s no better than the short word:
•    assistance (help)
•    numerous (many)
•    facilitate (ease)
•    individual (man or woman)
•    remainder (rest)
•    initial (first)
•    implement (do)
•    sufficient (enough)
•    attempt (try)
•    referred to as (called)
•    and hundreds more

Beware of slippery new fad words: paradigm and parameter, prioritize and potentialize. They are all weeds that smother what you write. Don’t dialogue with someone you can talk to. Don’t interface with anybody.”

 

  • Dan
    I am guilty of using some of these words. I love "facilitate." I guess I like how it sounds. It is fun to say.

    Are there occasions where you believe these words are acceptable?
  • Mo
    Yo Katie.

    "Relevant" is a useful, sales-tool kind of word that people frequently misuse. The problem is that things cannot be, in and of themselves, relevant or not relevant. They need to be relevant TO something or not relevant TO something. Thus these sentences taken from your article above, are incomplete:

    "Anything that’s not entirely relevant or usable has got to go" "Here’s what’s most relevant in terms of the work we do every day"

    Yes, Web writing is different from other kinds of writing, but some rules apply across the board, and this is one of them.
  • DanHaley
    We absolutely have to hammer home your first point: “The simplest sentences and websites take the most thought,” because the KISS mantra has actually done a disservice to content.

    After hearing “keep it simple” and “users don’t read on the web” ad nauseam from so many “experts,” clients and design firms have taken this to mean that content is easy to produce. Thus all the 13th-hour (if at all) content deliveries, and general content disrespect.

    So, yes: good content is simple, smart, and strategic. KISSS. (Or KISSAS.)
  • DanHaley
    We absolutely have to hammer home your first point: “The simplest sentences and websites take the most thought,” because the KISS mantra has actually done a disservice to content.

    After hearing “keep it simple” and “users don’t read on the web” ad nauseam from so many “experts,” clients and design firms have taken this to mean that content is easy to produce. Thus all the 13th-hour (if at all) content deliveries, and general content disrespect.

    So, yes: good content is simple, smart, and strategic. KISSS. (Or KISSAS.)
  • "Usage." Just say no.

    Well, more literally, just say "use."
  • Mo
    Indeed. Same goes for "utilize." Like Lon says, stick to "use" - a tidy word tired of having stuff appended to its little butt.
  • bencurnett
    Zinsser fan checking in. Your point about On Writing Well having golden rules on every page is dead on. Here's what I just opened to:

    "...revisions...are mainly matters of carpentry: altering the sequence, tightening the flow, sharpening the point."

    Timeless. Thanks for the post.
  • Thanks for the great post... and also the list of long words into short words. The bottom line is... KISS: Keep It Simple, Stupid.

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